You may be run into a time in a relationship where things get real hard, so hard, that it causes a break up. When someone tells you “It’s not you, it’s me” there may be more truth to that statement than you may realize.
Although most people consider that statement an insult because it’s a cheap way of someone getting off the hook when they really think the problem is with you, sometimes that may not always be the case. Sometimes the statement is an exact description of what happened to the relationship.
People go through many phases, adaptations, and changes in their lives. The teenage years and the 20’s are the most rapidly changing and developing stages of anyones life, and sometimes the lessons come later than that. These are the phases when you are still growing, learning, and trying to figure out who you are and what your life purpose is supposed to be.
This age range typically makes up about 90% of the egotistical assholes you’ll run into. By the time you hit your 30’s the only ego that remains is in those that have made it big and have something worthwhile to brag about, but for the rest of us, we are more humble and less ambitious. We don’t bother to keep up with the Jones’s because we don’t know or care about such things any longer, most of us take it day to day, or paycheck to paycheck.
Sure every now and then we buy something new or go on a vacation and have to light up facebook about it with pictures and statuses just to let all of our friends and nonfriends we’ve added on facebook know that our lives are so great and we’re having so much fun, but we all get at least a week a year to be an egotistical prick — I think that’s fair.
Sometimes it can be really hard to figure relationships out before your 30 because people change so fast and rapidly, the person you met a year earlier can be completely different altogether, and you yourself could have changed drastically too. This is why people always offer the advice of growing together, because it’s so damn easy to grow apart.
Some people can’t seem to gather any stability with relationships, jumping from person to person, trying to figure themselves out and another person that’s also changing rapidly isn’t an easy task. Then there are those that get lucky and find someone to spend their 20s with only to get divorced in their 30s and realize that they wasted a lot of good years for an illusion. And then there are those that stay together forever.
People judge one another so harshly, but the bitter truth is that there is nothing wrong with any of these people or the lives they lead. We are all on a different mission in this life, travelling down different paths, and let’s be honest, it would be an extreme rarity for two people to travel down the same path toward the same destination for the same mission, and if two such people existed, what are the odds that you would meet them?
What do you think the realistic odds are of that actually happening?
So maybe it’s safe to say that the majority of people travelling together, actually travel together too long, they forget to get off the train or the bus at the correct stop, or they are dragged along out of their way and it takes them a lot of time to get back to where they should be; such is life.
And under this logical conclusion of paths leads us to the most obvious thing of all — most people will only travel with you on your lifes journey for just a little while, be they friends or lovers, it matters not.
Everyone has a purpose in this life and when you meet someone and spend some time with them, even if it’s just for a minute, an hour, a day, many years, or forever, know that every chance encounter has a purpose.
The purpose could be to teach you something, for you to teach them something, or maybe simply to have someone by your side to help you in a time of need or for you to help each other.
It is very likely two people can travel the same paths for any period of time together, and it is even more obvious when it is time for your travel companion to go, so let them go and be happy for the time they gave you.
People will always tell you to give it your best. That things will be okay as long as you give it your all and be the best that you can be. And while maybe that is sound advice, the reality is that sometimes your best isn’t good enough.
You can be the best you that you’ve ever been, and the person you’re with can be the best them, but sometimes the best you and the best them just doesn’t go together.
At other times in your life you may not be the best you but your partner may be the best them or you may be the best you and they may not be the best them, and even though if you were both at your best it may work out, the timing just wasn’t right.
Alas, fear not, for you will walk the lonely road only when required to do so, but a much needed companion is never far away, if only the need arises for such a thing; be it for a second, a minute, or an hour — the universe will answer this calling to help you on your way.
It is said when the student is ready, the teacher will appear, and relationships are just part of learning about love and life. Will you become the teacher or the student, I cannot say, but it is without a doubt that you will play both roles on your journey many more times until the end, and sometimes both at once.
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