Chapter 6: Don’t Tase Me Bro

The Sheriff arrived on the scene of the missing wife. He phoned in to dispatch to let them know he was there and if they didn’t hear from him shortly they should send for backup.

He got out of the car and proceeded with caution to the front door. Before knocking he glanced in the window to assess any danger that he might be getting himself into. He saw two children running around in the living room and relaxed a little bit. He knocked on the door and waited.

The door was answered by a man who appeared to be in his thirties. As the sheriff stood there looking at him he thought to himself that this man was somehow familiar looking. He realized that he was staring at the man who had married Tiffany, Bill’s ex-wife.

“Good evening sir, I received a complaint that your wife has gone missing?”

“Yes Sheriff that’s correct. My wife and I were just sitting here eating dinner with our children, I glanced down at my plate to cut off a piece of steak, and when I looked up again….she was gone. I didn’t hear or see her get up, it seemed to me she just vanished.”

“So let me get this straight. Your wife, Tiffany it is right?”

“Yes, how did you know that?”

“I know her through mutual friend.”

The man nodded. “I see, well it is a small town so I guess that makes sense.”

Sheriff Ryan continued, “So you and Tiffany were eating dinner and you say she just…disappeared into thin air. Not a trace or hint as to where she had gone?”

“Yes, that’s right, just seemed to have vanished.”

Sheriff Ryan pulled out a small notepad and pen.

“Okay sir, and what is your name?”

“It’s Fred.”

“Last name?”

“Sheriff, is this necessary? I don’t think you’re taking me very seriously here. My wife has gone missing and you’re worried about my name?”

The Sheriff put his notepad and pen down by his side and looked up at Fred.

“Listen Fred, this is standard operating procedure in every complaint. This is information I have to record for my job. If Tiffany is indeed missing I need to have the complaint recorded, so if you don’t mind I’ll ask the questions and you answer them.”

“Are you saying that I’m making this up and my wife isn’t actually missing?”

“Look Fred, I’m not saying anything right now. I am taking down information for this complaint.”

The Sheriff raised his notepad and pen.

“Last name please?”

Skeptical that the Sheriff was taking him seriously he responded impatiently.

“Johnson.”

“Date of birth?”

“August 23rd, 1975”

“And approximately what time did you say your wife, Tiffany, went missing?”

“Look Sheriff, for the last time, she didn’t go “missing” she was at the table and then she vanished without a trace.”

The Sheriff looked up with a smirk on his face.

“What time would you say she disappeared then?

Feeling that the Sheriff wasn’t taking him seriously, Fred became angry and annoyed.

“Listen Sheriff, I’m not making this shit up. My wife just vanished before my eyes not even an hour ago and you show up here and treat me like I’m making this all up. I don’t need any shit from you. Are you going to help me or not?”

Sensing the anger in Fred’s voice the Sheriff had to make a decision.

“Yes, I’ll help you.”

Sheriff Ryan took out his hand cuffs.

“Please turn around and place your hands on your head.”

“You’re going to arrest me? Are you fucking insane!?”

“Sir, I’m not going to ask you again, do what I say or I will taser you.”

Fred turned on the Sheriff aggressively.

“This is fucking bullshit…” he began, but before he could finish, Sheriff Ryan had already pulled his taser gun out and shot 50,000 volts into him. Fred went stiff and crumpled to the ground unable to move. As the Sheriff proceeded to handcuff him he read him his Miranda rights.

“You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney, and to have an attorney present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be provided for you at government expense.”

Sheriff Ryan carried Fred to his squad car and placed him in the back seat. He got on his radio and called dispatch.

“Headquarters, this is Sheriff Ryan, we’re going to need social services out here to take care of two small children. I am bringing in a possible suspect in the disappearance of one Tiffany Johnson, that’s Tango India Foxtrot Foxtrot Alpha November Yankee, last name Juliet Oscar Hotel November Sierra Oscar November. Suspect refused to obey my lawful orders and was tasered at approximately 10:11PM. I will wait out at the residence until social services arrives and then I will bring him in.”

“Sheriff Ryan, this is headquarters. We copy that. Social Services has been alerted and someone will be out there shortly.”

Fred began to fidget in the back seat of the car. Angry that he had been tasered and then handcuffed like some criminal he began swearing at the Sheriff.

“Mother fucker, you think you’re hot shit with your taser gun. Why don’t you put that away and fight me like a real man. You ain’t shit.”

“Sir, if you continue to act hostile toward me and refuse to cooperate I will taser you again.”

Fred thought about being tasered again and immediately shut his mouth.

“I don’t have time for your games. There are people that actually need my help. First off, your story is unbelievable which leads me to believe you’re either crazy, on drugs, or pulling a prank on me. Secondly, if Tiffany is missing, you were the last one to see her and I seriously suspect foul play. So whether you like it or not, you’re going to go down to the jail and sit there until Tiffany turns up. Got it?”

“What about my kids?”

“Don’t worry about your kids, I have someone from social services coming to take care of them, they will be fine.”

As he said that a car pulled into the driveway. Out stepped a man who began walking toward the patrol car.

“Stay put and don’t try anything fishy, this is probably social services.”

Sheriff Ryan stepped out of his car to greet the man.

“Hi Sheriff, my name is Alan and I’m from social services. I received an emergency call from my agency saying there were children that needed to be looked after?”

“Hi Alan, thanks for coming. They are inside the house. Go right on in, I’m going to leave now and take this one to the jail to set him straight.” said the Sheriff in response as he made a gesture to the side of his head indicating the man he had just arrested might be crazy.

“Okay Sheriff, I’ll take it from here.”

Sheriff Ryan got back into his squad car and alerted dispatch that he was en-route to the county jail. He put the car in drive and pressed the accelerator.

*********

He found himself staring at his mother. “Where am I he thought to himself and how did I get here?”

After taking a moment to gather himself he looked around at his surroundings and realized he was in a hospital. His mother was directly across from him, sound asleep in a chair.

He quickly forgot about how he got here and started to wonder what he was doing here instead. There was a patient about ten feet away from him hooked up to all sorts of fancy equipment. His mother was still holding this patients hand even in her sleep.

Bill got up and walked up to the patient to see if he could get a better look at the patient. As he got closer to the hospital bed he suddenly slowed down. His heart dropped out of his chest and a rush of tingling ran through his entire body followed by immediate sweating. The person in the hospital bed….was him”

*********

“Bill…..Bill….Bill….wake up!”

Tiffany was awoken at the break of dawn by Bill because he was making weird noises and sounds in his sleep. She became afraid that Bill was having a nightmare. She didn’t want to even guess what this was about, it sounded horrible. His body began convulsing and twitching as he made these god awful noises. She was now at his side shaking him violently.

“Bill wake the hell up you’re scaring me.”

Bill jumped and awoke with a start nearly headbutting Tiffany in the face. He was sweating and his heart was racing. After a minute of familiarizing himself with his surroundings and seeing Tiffany, he realized he had been only been having a bad dream.

“Phew” he thought to himself. But as he had this thought, he became even more confused. He looked at Tiffany and saw a grave look of concern on her face.

“Tiffany, do you think it’s possible to have a dream inside of a dream?”

Hesitant to respond she said, “Bill, what on earth are you talking about? Are you okay, you scared the shit out of me?”

“I am pretty sure that you are not real and this is all part of a dream. This Island, everything around me, is a dream, but last night when I fell asleep in this “dream” I had another dream. I’m not quite sure what to make of it.”

“I’m not quite sure what you mean Bill. I don’t even know how or why we are having this discussion, it’s quite obvious that I’m dreaming as well.”

“This is a weird dream” she thought to herself. “How on earth did she dream up an Island where the only other occupant was her ex-husband and that he should fall asleep on the Island and have another dream of his own inside of her dream, scare the shit out of her while she was sleeping in this dream, and then have a conversation about it in the morning. Man, when I wake up I’ve got to see some serious help.”

“Tiffany, there’s not a whole lot that makes sense to me right now. But as I promised, I will tell you why you’re here, not that it even matters, since one of us is probably dreaming and this is all make believe.”

“Great” she thought to herself, “Now I’m going to dream that Bill has a reason why I’m here. What else will my mind think up.”

Somewhat amused now at this point she decided to just go along with it. With a smirk on her face and sarcasm in her voice she said, “Okay Bill, why don’t you tell me why I’m here. I’d love to hear it!”

Somewhat confused by her change in attitude Bill grabbed another banana from his pile and tossed it to her.

“Sure Tiffany, but let’s have some breakfast first. I don’t usually like to tell stories so early in the morning on an empty stomach.”

“Of course Bill. Do you have anything here but bananas?”

“Unfortunately no I don’t. This was all I brought to this location yesterday. After we eat what I have, we can go looking for something different?”

“No this will do.”

“Hrmph, some dream” she thought to herself, “Where’s the chocolate cake and pancakes?” she wondered.

Bill sat watching Tiffany eat her banana. Just being in her presence was jogging his memory.

“I remember how we used to have breakfast every morning before work. You would have my coffee ready. You made the best french toast.”

She glanced at Bill then went back to eating her banana.

“That was a long time ago Bill. A lot has changed since then but thank you for the compliment.”

“Sure, Tiffany. It’s just that sitting with you here eating breakfast is bringing back old memories.”

It was silent for a few minutes as they continued eating.

“I still make the best french toast, by the way.”

Bill looked up at her and saw that she was smiling at him. He smiled back at her. “Just like old times,” he thought to himself as the warm feeling of familiarity rushed through his body and he felt relaxed.

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